Being is not about how to behave but what to achieve. Morals teach us to be an active-alert citizen who avoids harm to others and society. One is taught in childhood how to talk, walk, be clean and carry oneself. But how does it help you later in life? How many of us even remember those lessons?
Society is morally degrading nowadays; people have forgotten about respecting others. Most of us are focused on our lonesome wellbeing, sometimes thinking of our family and never of the society. Few think charity is a way to remove sin, and thus philanthropy is the biggest virtue for them. Who isn’t happy being lazy? Quick commerce has exponentially increased, and so have quick fixes.
So where did we go wrong?
Where do we see ourselves in the future? Is it more degradation or upgradation?
If one sees an upgraded future, then what are they doing about it?
Now comes manners. The basics of manners are that all people should act for common goals. Focus not on the individual wellbeing but on the societal upliftment.
How much is in your control? Are your digestion, breath or even thoughts in your control? Is the movement of the tides, planets, stars or galaxy in our control? So how can the results be in our control?
All that one can control is their actions.
Actions come from desire; respect your desires and fulfil your actions – that is manners. Needless to say, your desires should also be for the betterment of the masses; then only are they considered good manners. Selfless actions are the fundamental of making a better place. But such actions are usually mocked and taken advantage of.
So how do you keep your intentions clear, take selfless action and do good?
You make a clear self-image of yourself, keep building your energy and set your timelines. Seems simple but needs discipline and tutoring.
When you start seeing value in others, you start respecting them; this goes for the self as well. The more value you provide, the more you gain respect. When you are in a respectful relationship, you communicate clearly and act for the good of the relationship. This means you have set goals and are discussing your milestones and working towards them. So manners are not simply physical attributes but have deep-rooted spiritual qualities and values.
Let’s shortlist all the aspects of manners:
1. Respect and care for others: Manners originate from recognising another person’s value and feeling a deep concern for their comfort.
2. Clear intention: Being transparent about your goals and motivations is a core component of good manners.
3. Informative communication: Keeping others informed about changes, delays, and reasons behind them demonstrates respect and helps them cooperate.
4. Mutual Benefit: A relationship built on manners is mutually beneficial, contributing to a morally correct and trustworthy connection.
5. Gaining Cooperation: Showing good manners, asking good questions, and being clear about intentions encourages people to be helpful and cooperative.
6. A Measure of Success: Living with manners is seen as a spiritual discipline that leads to success by securing people’s goodwill and collaboration.
7. A Spiritual Discipline: Learning and practising manners is the only truly spiritual endeavour, capable of resolving problems by creating caring relationships.
If you have reached here, give the newfound manners a try and note the changes that are happening within you and those around you.